Q: Explain as best you can what the appeal of kink/BDSM is to you? Why are you drawn to what you’re drawn to?
A: I adore the aftermath. When all is said and done; when my body is seizing, throat hoarse from screaming, cheeks stained with tears, when he takes me into his arms to hold me, tell me I am beautiful, that is all I need. Whatever happened in scene is over. It may have been magical, awful, fulfilling, but being held during that sensation of vulnerability satisfies my most basic need.
My enjoyment of intense scenes creates a need for deep emotional connection during and afterward. Aftercare is the best way to remind myself, and let someone else remind me that I am “okay,” and he isn't going to abandon me in my vulnerable state.